Positive Vocabulary

On the first day of school last week, I shared a funny video with everybody. Quite a few people mentioned that they liked the video, but I didn't like how I introduced it. Here's how my email started: 

If today isn't as magical as you envisioned, just watch this video, be thankful that you work in a middle school, and laugh a little. Laughter relieves stress.

What's wrong with this statement? If you didn't spot it immediately, the problem is that this statement makes the assumption that their dreams of a positive first day will be shattered, and they'll need a funny video to cheer them up at the end of the day. That's a pretty sad starting point for a video that was supposed to make them smile!

I had good intentions, of course... but even with good intentions, I managed to start the day with a message to the whole staff that started on a negative note. Now, I'm not trying to poo poo the video itself, or even the email, but I could have done a much better job of presenting it with a positive spin.

What I want to point out today is that a small change in vocabulary can completely change the way people receive your message. This is true across the board, from advertising, to classroom management, to casual conversations.

I had a professor in college who required a lot of presentations, and asked us to critique one another after every single one. It was really awkward at first, but she insisted that we never use any negative vocabulary to describe another student's presentation. For anything that we normally would have described in a negative light, we had to use the phrase "room for growth." That change alone made it really easy to give feedback without feeling like you were hurting someone, and really easy to receive feedback without feeling judged... and all it took was changing a couple words!

Think about how much many more positive reactions you would receive from your friends, family, and students if you found just one commonly used negative word in your vocabulary and changed it to something more positive.

I'm going to focus this week on eliminating that assumption of a negative outcome. I do that too much, and I need to try to cut that out of the statements I make. How about you? If you're stuck, here are some ideas. Just look for words you find yourself using often, and replace them with words that have a more positive spin!